Iam in need of someone serious

I am a 26 year old female who considers herself lesbian. I have been in realationships with men in the past but prefer a womans touch rather than a mans. I have always fantasised about being spanked by an older female. I have always had a fantasy of meeting someone online and asking them to do it but i get scared and never allow it to happen. I wont someone to hear why i need a spanking and not allow me to talk them out of it. I wish for them to come over or we meet somewhere ask me why i need to be spanked and after i tell her, for her just to pull me across her lap and give me the spanking i have deserved and so much desire. I live in upstate ny and am seeking someone in this area. Mae somebody can set me in the right direction i need help on this one.