Disappointment and a Top

[aurora]

Okay, here's the thing... Disappointment plays a big role for me. It's gut-wrenching to know that I've done something to disappoint my partner in anyway, BUTTTTTTTTTTTT (and note that it's a big "but") it's entirely self-inflicted. It's me who's convinced that my misdeed is the end of the world, and that his faith in me is shattered, and that my soul is forever tarnished until I can attone for my sins and hope to flush away said disappointment.

I don't think I've ever really had a partner say to me that he was disappointed. I don't think I would react well to actually having him vocalize something so harsh. I mean, sure, he can say he's disappointed at my course of action... but not actually in me. It's a minor difference, but it matters. I'd like to know that our relationship is secure enough that even my worst moments won't shake it or lower his opinion of me. My ideal partner would quide me when I'm misdirected, provide discipline to fortify my weaknesses, but always love me enough to not show any venom when I fail to please.