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#1
02-04-2007, 10:20 PM
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Changing Limits
Limits. We've all got them. I used to have a whole list of them. Now... not so much. I'll try anything once.
I used to say no to canes; since then, I've tried a taste and would love to experience more. I used to be real wary of discipline; I'm still not interested in doing it, but am much more open to the concept now that I have a better understanding of it. I used to say no bondage, ever; lately, I'm quite fond of the idea. I used to say I'd never let myself be photographed in a compromising position; but, look at that, there I am up there in the corner. Conversely, I developed a new limit that all tops WILL keep their pants on. (Don't ask.) What about you? How have your limits changed? Last edited by Adelina; 02-04-2007 at 10:23 PM. 
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#2
02-04-2007, 10:50 PM
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Quote:
Even in erotic play, many subs report that a dressed top imparts a sense that the dom in in charge, even if that's not otherwise in question. Doesn't have to be black tie, but should include at least pants. 
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#3
02-05-2007, 12:25 AM
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Well....
When we are using spanking as part of erotic play, RG will at least keep his boxers on. Does that count as pants on?  I agree about the spanker being clothed conveying more power/authority on a psychological level. adelina, I am like you...my limits have changed since I started in the scene and, like you, I have tossed out some of the 'nevers'. Pics were one thing. I have always been adamant, even in a vanilla context, to never allow compromising pics of myself to be taken. Now I am pretty comfortable with it, in most instances. A loooong time ago, when I first set out into the world wide web, I swore never to give my first name out to anyone, much less maintain telephone contact with people I'd met online or even meet them real life. Goodness, how that's changed! Now I am an organizer of a fairly successful spanko party that meets annually. I have always been pretty open about trying new things, however, so can't say that any other limits have changed. sarah
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#4
02-05-2007, 12:26 AM
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lol this discussion reminds me of an infamous incident from a few years ago where a bunch of tops took their shirts off in protest of one person's assertion that it was a sign of weakness to remove clothing. I WOULD agree that a top/spanker should keep his pants secured at all times, except when it comes to removing his belt one loop at a time.
 The question applies to tops/spankers as well. In the fetish world, people come up with their lists of "negotiables" where they list all kinds of things they love to do, MIGHT do, and wouldn't do EVER. These include anything from single-tail whips to dressing a submissive in diapers to observing the submissive while they use the toilet. I started actively "playing" 13 years ago, and I must say my list of negotiables includes a number of things that just didn't cross my mind when I first realized what I was. I'm sure most folks here have similar experiences.
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#6
02-05-2007, 05:33 PM
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#7
02-05-2007, 06:06 PM
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Sherie
__________________
 Check out my newly updated blog! Click the picture above.
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#8
02-05-2007, 07:58 PM
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i posted a reply to this last night and then my dumb computer froze up.
 so here goes again. i think this is a really cool question. my limits have definitely changed a LOT in the past four years (it was a little less than four years ago that i first typed "spanking" into my search engine). before i even started looking around on the scene, i was sure that there wasn't anything out there that fit my particular interests and assumed that everything close to what i liked was about leather and riding crops and the like. i "knew" that that wasn't for me. lol. once i started looking around and became pleasantly surprised that there were a lot of things out there that met my needs, i also drew some limits in terms of what i would and wouldn't be into. first i wasn't into hard spanking. then i tried it. lol. didn't like the idea of implements... got over that too. then i wasn't into discipline... until i got more comfortable with ttwd and experimented a little with my boyfriend. but THEN i was still completely sure that i wasn't *really* submissive. less than a year ago i was sure that my interest was only mock discipline and erotic spanking. since then i have tried SO many things that i thought i never would, including: - being "owned" - polyamory (not exactly related to ttwd, but it still surprises me that i do it when i think about it sometimes) - submitting to dominance over my non-sexual everyday life - having switches and floggers used on me - breath play - clamps in uncomfortable places (not thrilled with that one, but i'll do it) - bondage that includes the black leather restraints that i was once so nervous about at this point i would say that i don't have any real limits, other than playing with, you know, certain body fluids. although... i am in an exclusive long-term relationship. i might feel differently if was single and playing with casual partners or just beginning something new. there are times when i will tell my owners "doing X to me won't have the reaction that you're looking for," but if they took that information and decided that i should experience X anyway, i would accept it willingly. so i haven't gotten MORE restrictive on anything. all that i've done since i began my exploration is continue to open myself wider to new experiences.
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