I Got Inked!

[jerseysweet]

Today I got one of the tattoo's I have been wanting for sometime. It hurt...lots, but it was worth it.

Five years ago this summer, my father passed away, a victim to two very utterly awful diseases: depression and alcoholism. His suicide left me, a 13 year old, quite distraught. Now he's been gone five years and it's kind of unreal. Five years. Fuck thats a long time.

Anyway, I got a lotus flower/water lily - it looks like both kind of which is good. Lotus flowers symbolize the struggle of life, and the water lily is the July birth flower.

My father died on July 27th, 2002 and he was born on July 31, 1962. He missed his 40th.

Here are pictures of the tattoo. Tattooed by <a href = http://www.renesantiago.com>Rene Santiago</a>


~~~


<3
Kate

[Adelina]

Nice ink, jerseysweet.

I think it's cool when a tattoo isn't just for the rebel factor, but actually means something or serves a purpose. That's a neat way to affirm your father's life and memory. And it's very well done. The color is beautiful.

I haven't taken the tattoo plunge yet. My shipment of bravery must be on backorder.

[teefortexas]

Know what, Jerseysweet? I think that's a lovely tribute.

I think Dad's up there looking over you and beaming with pride that he was blessed with such a wonderful daughter like you.

My heart's with ya, baby.

Terry

[Rose]

Jersey, I lost my father in early 2002. He was severely depressed and an alcoholic too. It wasn't the alcohol that took him; he had a genetic heart problem that we never knew about until he passed. But I remember telling a trusted friend not six months before he passed that if he kept on drinking the way he was, he would die within a year.

I think your tribute is beautiful, and my heart goes out to you.

[jerseysweet]

Originally Posted by Adelina

Nice ink, jerseysweet.

I think it's cool when a tattoo isn't just for the rebel factor, but actually means something or serves a purpose. That's a neat way to affirm your father's life and memory. And it's very well done. The color is beautiful.

I haven't taken the tattoo plunge yet. My shipment of bravery must be on backorder.

Yeah, I don't believe in getting them to rebel - and honestly, it hurt (although not as much as I expected) so I don't see whys omeone would say "I'm 18 so I'm getting one and there's nothing you can do about it"....however, I'd get another one, but not for a while.

If you decide to get one, might I suggest taking your most caring top friend or your own top, with you. Mine was there and he held my hands the whole time and kept telling me to breath. He knew how much I wanted this and he didn't try and talk me out of it, he helped me through it...

Oh and if I scratch it (they itch like crazy when healing) he said "I've got a three fingered tawse that says you will not mess that tattoo up"



I love it.

[jerseysweet]

Originally Posted by teefortexas

Know what, Jerseysweet? I think that's a lovely tribute.

I think Dad's up there looking over you and beaming with pride that he was blessed with such a wonderful daughter like you.

My heart's with ya, baby.

Terry

Thanks Terry. I hope he is. Getting it hurt, although at times, was mostly a scratching that felt weird and uncomfortable, but then the sharper times hurt a lot, but I only cried when I thought about why I was getting it and what it was for. And I remember thinking at one particularly painful moment "Why the fuck did you go and die?" and knowing that if he didn't, I wouldn't be remembering him like this....but I'd rather have him than a tat any day of the week, even if he was pretty much a dead beat dad and never around, he was still my father.

Thanks so much for the kind words.

Kate

[jerseysweet]

Originally Posted by Rose

Jersey, I lost my father in early 2002. He was severely depressed and an alcoholic too. It wasn't the alcohol that took him; he had a genetic heart problem that we never knew about until he passed. But I remember telling a trusted friend not six months before he passed that if he kept on drinking the way he was, he would die within a year.

I think your tribute is beautiful, and my heart goes out to you.

I wish my father had died of a heart attack, or an illness, or because of the alcohol. But he didn't, and thats hard because it means it was his choice to die. It's not supposed to be up to us. You know? I don't believe he is a bad person for killing himself, and nor do I believe it's the "easy way out". Because I've tried, and it's not - I couldn't get passed thinking about it, it was too hard, way to big of a decision for me to make for myself. I can't imagine what he was going through and despite his faults, I miss him more than anything in the world.

Kate

[Kate]

Congrats of your tattoo! I'd always wanted one since I was a kid and got my first when I was 28--freaked a lot of people out. I now have five and know that number six will come when I have the money. Yeah, they hurt a lot but so what? I promise you that you'll love having it.

[Veronica Daniels]

That is a sad story, Jersey. One I am all too familiar with. I ran the family program in an alcohol and drug treatment program for years. That is where I worked when I first got out of grad school. It is a "cunning, baffling and powerful disease" says the big book of AA and I have always found that to be a very true statement. Alcoholism and depression often go hand in hand. I am sorry for the loss of your father, that is very hard on a young girl.

You have chosen a lovely way to remember his spirit! Good for you!

I got my first and only tattoo about three years ago. It has great meaning for me as well and I have never regretted it because of that.

Best always-
Veronica