[Adelina]

Sarah,
I guess I didn't answer the question, sorry! I'm not a submissive, so I didn't think the question itself really applied to me. If I don't feel like something, I just say so and that's the end of it. Sooo, maybe I shouldn't have popped into this thread at all! Too late now.

Even if I was in a full-time kink relationship, I'd still retain the right to say no to play when I'm not in the mood for it, which is why I don't identify myself as a submissive. It is imperative to me to have the final word on what goes on in my life. I have a number of toppy friends and my own top who are invaluable resources for me when I need advice or a sounding board to vent... but I'm the one who ultimately decides what I will do about things.

I've definitely had times I'm not in the mood to play, or discuss spanking online, or do anything involving it... so I don't. Being an object for a Dom's use whenever he wants isn't something that appeals to me outside of a scene.

I can attest that I've had sex when I was not in the mood, because I'm never in the mood, so if that was my basis for saying no, my poor hubby would never get any. That wouldn't be fair! I just go with it and do my wifely duty.